ECSE Wk 4- Fathers

 This was week which was both hard as well as bitter/sweet.  It was hard to talk about fathers (which I addressed in the Father's post), but it was so refreshing to get many of the same feeling's that I felt (but, because his diagnosis was delayed as well as hearing impaired- to begin with, Mr Holland's Opus. Rel. Dec 29, 1995, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CB1-ASsrNQI [trailer incl.]).  The scene were his [Cole's] mother looks down on him, sleeping, through the fire engine sirens during a 4th of July Parade, about sums up my feelings of discovery that Eli was beginning to have difficulties.   To have his father, turn on him and beat him, was unthinkable; but we ran (at his age 4) to try and start again.  To have a kindergarten principle, force me to sign an IEP  I did not agree with, because they "did not have funding for him" in their school was unimaginable.  The Lord was watching out for us, in numerous ways: 1) a caring Service Coordinator in the form of Callie, who was there, and proved to be a life-long friend. 2) A principle from the school I just had begun working at 3-4 weeks before, welcoming children, with open arms. 3) A charter school who accepted him on first round-personalizing instruction, as no other.  (coincidentally, his SPED director/teacher was undergoing her own chemo, for breast cancer, during this time). 4) A profession (para-professional) where I could see and learn the intricate, inner workings of a SPED program (with seasoned professionals-20 yrs + and to those, right out of college), 5) A love and compassion for these kids, which let an idea, a glimpse, a plan, of how to help form, seeing myself as merely extension of His hands.  6) Miraculously surviving as a family of 3 on $9,000 annual income.  These are just a few, and a spotlight, really of the miracles that we have seen.

Learning on how to meet Eli's needs, not shut out Leta, my 13 year-old daughter, have and see her independently advocating for those with special needs and difficulties.  Knowing that there is an army, that at many times that I do not see, which help us with the day to day tasks.

Remembering, always, "We are spiritual beings having a mortal experience" (from a plaque I saw in 1996 within the Salt Lake City, UT, Deseret Bookstore, ZCMI), and my assignment is to "bring them home".

Quote:  From Connections (Washington State Father's Network), "Push Fear Aside" by Alex Parrott, Winter 201, vol 13:1

"I am staring at a piece of paper hanging on the wall in a frame. The same person who never had to study and coasted their way through school, all the way through college is sitting in some

other office looking at the same diploma I am. That is exactly how I look at Braxton’s life and the people around him growing up. Yes, while it may take him a bit longer to pick something up, learn to walk, read, write and ride a bike, he WILL get there and in the meantime I will treat him no differently than my four year old son."

 
 Having teenagers, I both remember and admire his perspective and dedication, to his son.  I hope that he does not get caught up in "the diagnosis" when thing do not go as even as "worse case scenario" may apply.  I really liked "Today" ['s] clip, and how it shows, how expectations can come out of the blue, or blind side (both them and us, as support teams).  We need to be flexible and in touch.  Callie, was amazing, in this way.  We had other "help", "coordinators", etc, but she ALWAYS cared, seemed to know what each person needed ("observe and then serve"-she lives it!";  Linda Burton, Oct 2012 Women's Conf.), she follows up, (on promptings) even if after hours or inconvenient.  She DOES put her family FIRST!...And you have to.  You cannot give from an empty bucket.  She finds ways to fill hers, (and is consequently, blessed).



https://gradstudies.byu.edu/page/costs-financial-aid:  There is more aid available, in graduate studies, than I thought (I thought it would be pure loans).  It's about as expensive as I thought though $29,080 for 2 year, evening and summer program.  The condition and concern are moving.  I need to see if any part can be taken abroad or online (non-resident, status). Project for next week, calls.

https://www.isu.edu/education/programs/graduate/
I had spoken to some ISU representatives RE: a Master's in SPED (at a school event at the Green Belt in I.F., last summer), and they made it sound like it was not only a possibility, but also using the I.F.  satellite campus, for my studies. http://coursecat.isu.edu/graduate/programs/.  I found my program, with some searching, but, again, will need to call on specifics-like those mentioned above, for next weeks project.   This way I can stay in Idaho, residency, and not concern with the divorce/visitation availability (if his family wants to see them).  The cost is FT $4,464 per semester with $447/cr., PT (and I was unable to find, either the schedule or length of program- apply to compare next week).  Just knowing myself...I would consider PT, first, in 1) efforts to do my best and 2) afford to go to graduate school.

I need to keep in mind, what my children need.  Things may not be easy, but when we do what's right- there is a way.  I just need to "go over the [proverbial] wall" and find it. (1 Ne. 4:4-6)